"For the last time, get down from that tree, the dog left two days ago." A scrawny kitten backed down the only tree in the whole city. I grasped the scruff of its neck with my mouth and carried it home. Immediately, it meowed "please don't give me a lecture, I need a nap."

I roughly tossed it up into its bed and said, "All right, there's a nap for you!"

I walked out of the alley into the street and waited for the strangest friend in the world to meet me. I knew that who I was meeting would give me the help I needed to finish the assignment I had been given to Mittens. Pretty soon tiddles arrived. I knew that anyone who would trust him was very dumb. Slobber dripped out of his mouth. I turned my head and gagged. I asked myself if dogs ever took baths. "All right, count all the dogs on Main Street, up around the water park, and down west Hill," I told Tiddles, the miniature white mutt.

Tiddles drooled back, "Why should I do that?"

"Because, I'll scratch your nose, you need a job, and I'm the one in control here," I replied.

He stepped back a step and whined. I felt sorry for the little mutt so I said, "I'll give you some dog food." He accepted that and trotted away. On my way back to Kitty Care I wondered how I would tell the leader of the cats that all of those dogs were counted in such a little amount of time without help? All of the cats knew that they hadn't helped me. So it was obvious I got the help of a dog.

This was serious because every cat in every city and every country on every continent knows that if you barely attempt to talk to a dog at all you are instantly expelled from the litter box and you have to hunt for your own food. I really didn't want to go with out a litter box even though I had almost been there and I had even gone to trial. All because of dogs.

"Hiyaah," A little gray kitten said as it jumped on my head.

I asked it in a whisper. "Are you good at lying?"

"Yes," he answered as he pulled out a list of how many times he had lied.

I asked him, "Could you lie to the leader cat?"

"Look at my list."

He pointed to the name Mittens on his list, behind it was the number 10. I had seen some kits that could lie but not this many times and to the leader. After telling the little gray kitten what he must do everything was ready and we were walking toward Mitten's house. As I walked I began to wonder if it would be me or Mittens on the little gray kitten's list next.