Recently the Betster went on a fact-finding trip to Scotland, just like a U.S. Congresschimp’s chief of staff. Hey, there was even corporate support — 50,000 air miles courtesy of one of those credit card mileage plans. No turf was mutilated at St. Andrews, however. The Betster went out and got the real skinny on Scotland.

Facts: Haggis: OK; blood pudding: didn’t dare; Galloway steaks: wonderful; 7-year-old Lochranza single-malt whiskey: to die for; a gallon of gasoline: if you have to ask, you can’t afford it.

How to talk Scots: “Edinburgh” is said “Edinburra,” “Hawick” is said “Hoyck,” and “England” is said … Well, you don’t say the E-word in Scotland. The Scots still haven’t forgiven Edward Longshanks, pfft, for what he did to William Wallace.

But the most amazing thing about Scotland is that it’s just like Alaska. Well, sort of, without the ruined castles and the sheep. You have the same feisty, independent people, the same rugged individuals, the same gregarious folks eager to talk your ear off for the price of a pint. Even the weather is the same, good and gloomy, clouds you can chew on, except when it’s glorious and sunny — not that this happens much, so don’t get cocky. Fishermen are fishermen, and they have the same squinty look whether facing the North Sea or North Pacific. Aye.

So if you’re Scots and find yourself in Alaska, you’re among compatriots even if you did not know it. Pull a pint, sit down on this bar stool, and we’ll tell you a few yarns, like some of these Best Bets:

BEST GET ACROSS THE BAY BET: Not everyone has a sweet little Tolman skiff to zip around the bay, but that’s OK. Thanks to Community Schools, you can get to Kachemak Bay State Park and hike the trails at a reduced water-taxi rate. This week, hike the Saddle Trail from Humpy Creek. The drop-off is at 10 a.m. Friday. Call 235-2947 to register.

BEST MAYBE AL IS RIGHT BET: Our former veep has been getting some press going all Hollywood-like about global warming. Deborah Williams of Alaska Conservation Solutions might not be as flashy as the Gorester was at Cannes, but she’ll be talking about the same issue. Catch her at 7 p.m. today at the Pratt Museum.

BEST ART FOR THE TREES BET: Hey, when you let Homer’s artists loose in the woods behind the Pratt Museum, trees can become art. You never know with the annual Facing the Elements exhibit. The show opens at 5 p.m. Friday, with music by the Animalogy-Woodwind Quintet at 7 p.m.

BEST THIS AND THAT BET: It’s not just dinner. It’s not just entertainment. It’s dinnertainment, Otter Beach Learning Center’s Summer Soiree on the Ridge. The fund-raiser starts at 7 p.m. in an elegant Diamond Ridge setting — which is like the whole ridge, you know? Tickets are $75 at the Homer Bookstore, or call 235-6547 for details.

BEST ALL-LIVE MUSIC, ALL THE TIME BET: Those wild and crazy writers in town last week know about Homer’s live-music scene. The word is they shut down the house with Twitching Sushi Sunday night. If you want to hear Alaska and beyond’s finest bands, check out this page for some of the offerings: The Tim Strum Band, Token Counter Slug and Contraband at Amped, The Bacot Babes at Kharacters, Three Legged Mule at Beluga Lake Lodge and Elders on Fire at the Alibi and more.

BEST GO FOR PAR BET: Shh, Scots didn’t invent golf — it was invading Vikings who came up with a Good Walk Spoiled. Why else would you call it the Swede Carlson Memorial Golf Tournament? The annual contest starts at 10 a.m. Saturday at the Lynx Golf Course on East End Road. Tickets are $25, including golf, food and drink.