The other night while looking up at the northern lights, your humble back-page philosopher had this way cool cosmic revelation: Homer is one big performance art production. Think about it. How else can you explain certain recent events?

Take the Fred Meyer Sturm und Drang. A big Outside corporation says it’s kindasorta thinking about moving to Homer. A former city manager says, Hey, how about building on a wooded lot right in the center of town? Then the same old cast of civic leaders, rowdy activists and biz leaders get all worked up. Drama ensues.

Years later, our dreams of cheap underwear vanish like a Spit Rat’s tent on a plus 20 high tide. It makes you wonder. Could this have been some corporate prankster pulling a fast one on Homer? Or maybe one of the usual suspects here in town manipulated the issue so as to get maximum entertainment value out of it.

Admit it. Didn’t the Fred Meyer Show offer us some cabin fever relief? Didn’t it fill up the city council agenda on nights when they’d otherwise be debating sewer assessments? Weren’t some of you digging into the issue not out of civic spirit, but for the amusement value?

OK, maybe the Betster stood outside too long under those wacky solar rays. People take these issues seriously, real seriously. The B. shouldn’t mock good-hearted citizens working to make this town a better place to live. In a world of real storm and stress, sometimes things can be serious — deadly serious. Only the Betsteroid is reminded of that great philosopher, Mr. James Buffett, who said, “If we couldn’t laugh we would all go insane.”

So, merry pranksters, seek out the humor and joy in life, perhaps with some of these Best Bets:

BEST SPIKE! BET: Team work, passing, strength and strategy. The Homer boys aren’t the only athletes in town. The Homer girls volleyball team rocks in town this week, plus you don’t have to brave a September storm. Check out the Peninsula Challenge at 4 p.m. Friday at the Alice Witte Gym at Homer High School when Homer is the host of the best volleyball on the Kenai.

BEST PLAY LIKE CRAZY BET: Check out a way different sport at 8 p.m. Friday at the Homer Theatre with “Murderball,” a film about rugby played by people in wheelchairs — tricked out, Mad Max chairs. The Friday showing benefits the Independent Living Center and its new recreational program.

BEST SPEAK OUT BET: Over at the Homer Council on the Arts, “How the Ink Feels” shows that poetry can be a visual as well as literary art, with beautiful broadside prints of poetry. From 7-9 p.m. Friday, poetry becomes spoken art, too, when local poets are invited to read at an open mic. Come listen or read and share the love of literature.

BEST STOCK UP FOR WINTER BET: A little greenery, a two-foot stack of books, and you’re all set for those coming dark days. Ayup, it’s time for the Friends of the Library Book and Plant Sale fund-raiser. It runs 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Saturday at the Homer Public Library, but you know the routine: get there early for first crack at the best stuff.

BEST RIVER, SEA; SEA, RIVER BET: Those huge tides this week have been filling up Beluga Slough, a reminder that we live where rivers meet seas. Those big swamps do more than slow down winter storms — they’re the lifeblood of the bay. Celebrate the slough with National Estuaries Day from noon-4 p.m. Saturday at the Alaska Islands and Ocean Visitor Center.

BEST INSIDE PERSPECTIVE BET: All sorts of Outside experts have been pontificating about the tragedy of Timothy Treadwell. Alaskan Nick Jans brings his inside perspective to the issue with his book, “The Grizzly Maze.” Jans speaks at 7 p.m. Tuesday at the Alaska Islands and Ocean Visitor Center.